I Currently Feel Like I Live in a Diorama

Over the past few days I’ve been living for today. Yet the promise of thunderstorms and rain and all kinds of delicious summer weather that I would take any day over the hot sun is MIA. Instead it’s a stunning sunny day with a bright blue sky, puffy white clouds and a delicious breeze. Don’t get me wrong, I love days like today but I want violent storms with house-shaking thunder and lightning so close it cracks and makes your hair stand on end.

When I was 7, Mom and Dad packed up their tiny Acadian hatchback (think the Accent hatchback of the late 70’s to mid 80’s) and drove my sister and I out to western Canada then back through the States. I think our turn around destination was Calgary. I have no idea how Mom and Dad kept Ashley and I entertained but I do remember the scenery.

Going through the Prairies was beautiful. The horizon seemed to be thousands of miles away and the lines demarcating the ground, sky and occasional rock or piece of scenery were in such sharp relief that I had easily convinced myself that I was living in a shoe-box project some little kid was going to take to school that day.

I could almost see the strings attached to the cotton-ball clouds we were driving under, and if I looked closely, I swore I could see tiny places where the crayon lines didn’t quite overlap. Maybe it was just a cornfield in the distance, but to a 7-year old, the magnitude of space we were experiencing was sensory overload.

This was also the trip I discovered prairie dogs love Hot Rods and cheese sticks and that there really is a Corn Palace. The doll museum kind of scared me, but not enough that I passed up the opportunity to pick out a souvenir and the Helicopter ride over Mount Rushmore with Ashley and Dad. However, that’s another story for another day.

Today I feel like a little doll, plucked out of my real life and dropped into a glass bottle full of sunshine, blue paint and cotton balls. My tiny doll house is in shambles as though some giant has picked it up and shaken it. When will I be an adult again with a real adult life?